Corey’s not dead…well…not yet anyway…

…hmmm…Corey’s not dead…that is a fantastic band name.  Over the last several months, I have received many emails and text messages, even a hand full of phone calls  inquiring as to my health, well-being, and current state of living.  I can assure you…I’m alive and in moderately good health.  I have just had a lot on my mind and really didn’t have it in me to put in all into words.  First of all, it would have been a whole lot to write, and second of all, I’m not a good enough writer to do it.  Thanks to everyone for checking on me though…it’s nice to know I have people in the world who care about me and want to make sure I have not thrown myself off any large buildings.   I have missed writing…and it feels good to just sit down and type out my unedited thoughts again. 

A lot has happened since my last post…I don’t even know where to begin.  Lets see…I got a new job…Operations Manager for a technology consulting firm in Kirkland (it’s not near as cool as it sounds…and come to think of it, it doesn’t sound all that cool).  I got dumped…a girlfriend with whom I reconnected said she met someone new…which was very da ja vu for me because she said the same thing 5 years ago.  This time she ended it with compassion and respect…a stark difference from the last time.   As far as dumpings go…this one was definitely in my top 3…if we had goodbye sex, it might have even been #1…but, sadly, we did not.  I had a really good time with her…sitting in her living room debating about love, sex, food and music.  Reading out loud to one another from various books we found enjoyable.  Unfortunaltely…she found the proverbial Mr. Right…and it wasn’t me.  She was quite pretty to look at…and I could listen to her passionately talk for hours about how to properly prepare a steak and how John Mayer is the prophet of our generation.  Red wine and ambien make for great conversations!  I will miss that…and her.

My best friend moved to Texas….thats right…fucking Texas!  A god damn red state for Christs sake.  We still talk via IM and send one another drunk texts (we are not gay I swear)…but it’s not the same.  He moved to Texas for an awesome girl…now before you say “what the fuck!…you should know she REALLY is an awesome girl…and totally worth it…but it’s still Texas…and I still miss him.  No more late nights of drinking and talking about girls…or what super power we would pick and why (note to self…future post about what super power I would pick and why)…and knowing he was around when I needed him…which was quite a lot.  There is no way in hell I’m visiting him in texas until winter though….way to damn hot..and I’m not sure how I will fare in a red state…thought getting my ass kicked in Texas would make a great blog post!  I’m going to be best man at his wedding in the Bahamas in September though…which is going to be sweet.  4 days at a luxury resort with all the top shelf liquor you can drink included in the price.  Oh yeah…this has international incident written all over it.  One last adventure with my best friend as he transitions from one life to another…I can’t wait!

I’m open to exploring new and old options in love…taking things one day at a time…but feeling good about it…no expecations, no presure…just enjoying the thought of being with someone I care about.  If it works out… great…if it doesn’t…that is ok too.  I feel like I’m finally at a point where I can leave my many many demons in the past and think only about today…and maybe even tomorrow.  It’s early..and maybe I’m way to optimistic…but at least I can go into something with my eyes wide open..and know I’m not going to sabotage things like all my other relationships over last 10 years.  Well…that is my hope anyway…wish me luck!

If I have any readers left…thank you for staying with me.  I needed some time to sort through changes in my life and prepare for changes in the future (complete career change…more to come on that).  I feel like I’m ready to start writing again and putting my thoughts into words I can share with those who care to listen.  I make no promises on how much I will be able to post…but I can honestly tell you that it’s really great to be typing into WordPress again.  Thanks for reading…

“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”

– Maria Robinson

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~ by coreysays on July 10, 2010.

3 Responses to “Corey’s not dead…well…not yet anyway…”

  1. Today is a much better place to be then yesterday and tomorrow looks better than today…… Just stay away from the peanut butter M&Ms. 😉 xo

  2. You’re right. It’s really not the same sadly, but we will have a great time in the Bahamas, unless there’s a hurricane and our resort gets soacked in BP’s fluids. There’s always that.

  3. YAY! So glad to see you kicking around again-now come bring me my owed drinks, damn you! 😉

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